mention of peter cook and sexual proclivities imagined or real has spurred me to hunt down this excerpt to post, in case people might find it or variations of it useful at parties:

"I'm very interested in the grasshopper and its leaping ability. I haven't got an unhealthy interest in it, mind you. I'm not obsessed by it. I haven't got an unhealthy sexual interest in the grasshopper. At least I've never had any sexual activity with a grasshopper. Or if I have, nobody saw me. And if they did see me it's their look out."
-Peter Cook, "Interesting Facts" 1960

If I could, I would deliver the same speech, replacing "grasshopper" with "peter cook".

In his column, "peter cook's monday morning feeling", excerpted in this book, there are a couple of mentions of the Sex Pistols and a conversation with Johnny Rotten, that are fun to read, that were written in 1977. He deteriorates from referring to them as "...the Sex Pickles, the group named after the Queen's corgis..." to referring to them as the Sox Pickles. He talks about how he hit his wife while backing out of the driveway but mistook her screams as part of "Pretty Vacant" (by the Sox Pickles), which he was playing at the time.